We all have habits, some helpful and others… not so much, like binge-watching an entire series when you know that you have an early morning meeting. Habits shape our lives in ways we often don’t realize as they can help us thrive or leave us in cycles that we’d rather break free from.
But the fact is that breaking bad habits often takes more than just sheer willpower – we need to understand why we do what we do. Once you crack the science behind habits, you can start using that knowledge to truly rid yourself of those habits.
The 3 R’s of habit formation
Every habit that is formed, follows a simple and predictable loop.
This loop is what makes habits stick because your brain loves efficiency and shortcuts. The reward is the dopamine hit that reinforces the cycle, making it even harder to stop through willpower.
Breaking free from bad habits just means interrupting this loop and replacing it with something better that your brain can’t help but love. Here’s how we can do that:
Steps to break a bad habit
1 . Spot the Trigger
The loop won’t start in the first place if the trigger doesn’t exist and you can’t fix what you don’t understand. Track your habits for a few days and find out:
For example, let’s say you’re trying to stop snacking late at night. You may realize that t always happens when you’re watching TV and so, you can take action with this awareness like, eeping healthier snacks nearby or opting for a book instead of a Netflix binge.
2 . Find your Why
Why do you want to change this bad habit? Delve deep and be brutally honest with yourself.
Is it about improving your health, feeling more productive, or setting a good example for your kids? Write it down and revisit it often.
For example, if you’re deciding to quit smoking, your “why” might be to improve lung health, save money or even to keep up with your family on long hikes. Linking your “why” to your long-term goals helps build motivation.
3 . Swap the Habit for a better one
You can’t just put a full stop to a habit because that leaves a void that is extremely easy to fall back into. Instead, you can replace it with a better alternative.
Say you’re trying to get back on sugars when working. Instead of fighting with yourself when you see a candy bowl in the pantry, keep a stash of healthier options like fruits or nuts at your desk. Over time, it’ll be easy for your brain to start associating hunger with these new choices.
4 . Be okay with imperfection
Here’s a not-so-fun fact: You’re human and you’re going to slip up – and that’s okay!
What matters is how you handle those moments when you slip up. Instead of beating yourself up over a single failure, celebrate your wins.
Did you miss a workout? Celebrate the two that you did complete this week!
The key to breaking a habit is the same as building a habit – consistency and effort. Keep going, even if you stumble.
5 . Reward your progress
Positive reinforcements can do wonders.
Every time you successfully resist an old habit or embrace a new one, give yourself a small reward. It could be as simple as treating yourself to a coffee or taking a guilt-free hour to relax. These little victories keep you motivated and remind you that progress is worth celebrating.
6 . This is a Marathon; not a Sprint
You’ve probably heard the myth that it takes 21 days to break a habit. Hate to be the bearer of bad news but it takes most people an average of 66 days i.e., a little more than 2 months to do it, and that is if you’re consistent.
Change takes time, especially if it’s for something that is as deeply ingrained as habits. Stay committed and realistic, and if progress feels slow then take a step back and evaluate what’s working and what isn’t.
Take Control of Your Habits
Did you know that habits often tie into how we feel physically? Stress, anxiety, and even fatigue can trigger bad habits like mindless snacking or endless scrolling. Incorporating small, healthy changes, such as practicing mindfulness or engaging in regular exercise, can have a ripple effect on breaking bad habits.
Keep in mind that nothing is ever about perfection, it’s about consistent and steady progress. It’s about understanding your triggers, creating better routines, and celebrating every small step forward. Your brain is wired for change – it just needs a slight nudge in the right direction. Start small, be kind to yourself, and trust the process.
“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.” – James Clear, Author of Atomic Habits
Set up a system that works for you, and watch as those bad habits fade into the background.
