Once upon a time, a small boy caught a flea inside a small jar. At first, the flea leapt high in an attempt to escape and hit the jar lid. The flea kept jumping high and every time, it kept hitting the lid. Over time, it learned to jump just high enough to avoid hitting the lid. One day, the boy decided to let the flea go free and opened the jar but the flea, now conditioned to not jump high enough to hit the lid, never jumped out of the jar although it was free to do so.
What does this story have to do with anything? Well, we all carry our own “invisible lids” which are beliefs that hold us back from exploring our potential or seizing opportunities. These limiting beliefs are mental constraints we’ve internalized, often without realizing it. Ever caught yourself saying any of the following things?
“I’m not smart enough to lead this project.”
“I’ll never be as successful as them.”
“Taking risks will only lead to failure.”
These are all your limiting beliefs and they stem from past experiences, societal conditioning, and fear of the unknown. What started as protective mechanisms eventually become barriers to growth, keeping us away from opportunities for success, happiness, and self-discovery.
The good news? You can identify, challenge, and eliminate these beliefs to unlock your true potential. Here’s how:
1 . Identify the Invisible Lid
You need to recognize your limiting beliefs before you can break free of them since these thoughts tend to masquerade as facts inside your head.
Start by asking yourself:
Write down these beliefs that you have and dig deeper into them. For example, if you think, “I’m terrible at public speaking,” think about whether this belief is based on a single bad experience or an assumption that you’ve made without any evidence.
One thing that can help you in this regard is journaling because by putting your thoughts on paper, you will be able to separate facts from fiction and start questioning the validity of your beliefs.
2 . You’re not the victim
It’s tempting and easy to blame your circumstances, other people and even fate for where you are right now but genuine growth only begins when you take responsibility for your life. Most people prefer to think that things simply happen to them and that their circumstances are beyond their control which is known as the external locus of control and is a limiting belief in and of itself.
Adopt the mindset that life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you. While you may not be able to control every single event, you are in full control of how you choose to respond to them and this shift will empower you to rewrite your narrative.
A simple way to do this would be to think, “What can I do to succeed despite ___?” instead of “I can’t succeed because of ___” as this method of thinking gives the power and control back to you.
3 . Test your beliefs
If you do not test and scrutinize your belief system, it becomes a fertile land for limiting beliefs to grow. Challenge your beliefs by asking questions like:
Let’s take an example – if you believe that you’re not creative, look for examples where you’ve solved problems innovatively or contributed fresh ideas. You can also ask your family, friends and co-workers for help as they will be able to provide an objective and non-biased perspective.
4 . Embrace uncertainty
Certainty provides us comfort and stability and so, we tend to crave it but this desire can chain us to our limiting beliefs and can prevent us from changing or taking risks.
Imagine you’re hanging onto a cliff, afraid of letting go although there is a safety net right below and you have a harness on. Letting go feels terrifying, but it’s the only way to experience freedom.
Here’s a simple test to give you that extra push – it’s known as the “rocking chair test”. Picture yourself at 90 years old, reflecting on your life so far. What are the things you would regret? Often, the fear of regret can outweigh the fear of uncertainty, giving you that much-needed incentive.
5 . Beginner’s mindset
Sometimes, our limiting beliefs are created from thinking that we know everything we need to about a particular situation. The truth is that even the most experiences and seasoned professionals were once beginners and approaching life with a beginner’s mindset can break down the walls that limit you.
Instead of assuming that you “can’t”, ask yourself “What if I could?” Explore every opportunity with a curious mind and fresh eyes as this not only helps you let go of beliefs that hold you back but also creates a road towards discovering untapped potential within yourself.
6 . Change your self-talk
Your internal dialogue shapes your reality. Limiting beliefs often manifest as negative self-talk, such as:
Challenge these statements by replacing them with affirmations:
Repeating affirmations might feel awkward at first, but over time, they’ll rewire your brain, replacing negativity with empowerment.
7 . Surround yourself with the right people
“Birds of a feather, flock together”
The people you surround yourself with can either fuel your growth or add to your limitations. Be mindful of the individuals you choose to spend your time and energy with. Surround yourself with people who inspire, challenge, and uplift you.
Having someone who believes in your potential and eggs you on to achieve everything that you want to, can truly be a game changer in your life. A life coach, in particular, can help you uncover hidden limiting beliefs and guide you toward breaking free from them and can make all the difference in your journey of growth.
Breaking Free and Moving Forward
Your beliefs shape your reality and eliminating the beliefs that limit you, will lead you to an open door of endless possibilities. As the saying goes, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”
Choose to believe in your potential as the only barriers that exist are the ones you allow to exist.
